The good news is, my brain survived -- watching part of the first night of the Republican National Convention.
Yes, it came close to exploding at times (actually, many times), but I was able to press the "stop" button on my remote fast enough to avoid serious damage to my truth-loving neurons.
The bad news is, just about everything else.
Given all the GOP talk about the Democratic Convention being too dismal and dark, with the Republican Convention going to be all Reagan'esque sunshine and positivity, I was thinking that maybe that actually would happen.
Fear and trembling before the dreadful specter of Socialist Joe Biden and his sidekick Communist Kamala Harris was a recurring theme.
The McCloskey's, a couple who pulled guns on peaceful Black Lives Matter protesters walking past their St. Louis home, said that if Biden wins it is the end of the suburbs.
I wasn't aware that Sleepy Joe Biden, as Trump calls him, had the power to reduce the suburbs to a pile of smoldering rubble, upon which hordes of poor Black people will dance as they celebrate getting to live in the low-income housing that will replace the demolished single-family homes.
At least, that's what I assume will happen after watching as much of tonight's Republican Convention as I could endure.
On the plus side, I learned how to put on a Republican Convention after watching just a portion of the proceedings, which I assume reflected what the nation will be subjected to for the next three nights.
Here's the recipe:
(1) A stage.
(2) With American flags.
(3) Lots of them.
(5) Who lie.
(6) Almost constantly.
And that's about it. An initial video was slickly produced, but the rest of the convention looked like it was produced and directed by a community college television class.
I also watched a good portion of the CNN commentary that followed the prime time convention proceedings.
Not surprisingly, the GOP talking heads felt that the convention convincingly warned the country of the Dempocalypse that would come on the heels of a Biden victory in November.
The other CNN commentators made sense.
Namely, there was no effort by anyone other than Trump himself to make Trump look like a caring, empathetic person, because he isn't. Also, the GOP strategy is to fire up the base, not to appeal to undecided independent voters with a reasonable message.
And most disturbingly -- a point stressed by Van Jones -- the whole "end of suburbs" thing is a very thinly disguised racist dog whistle.
Watch out, white folks! Those socialist Black Lives Matter protesters are going to bring crime and chaos to your beloved cul-de-sacs. Well, after Biden takes your guns away so you have no means of protecting yourself.
I deeply doubt that this absurd message will resonate with the mythical "suburban housewives" Trump likes to talk about. I think Trump is mired in the situation comedies of the 50's and 60's where no women worked outside the house, and focused on keeping their husband happy when he came home after earning the family living.
Jones correctly noted that almost all of the Black Lives Matter protests have been peaceful. Yes, troublemakers have committed crimes at some protests, including nearby Portland, Oregon.
That needs to stop, while peaceful protests need to continue.
Trump and the Republican Party would have been smart to make that their message, rather than talking about protesters being Marxist revolutionaries. Huh? My wife and I took part in a protest here in Salem, along with thousands of other people -- none of whom appeared to be a Marxist revolutionary.
But maybe I was fooled by the masks they were wearing.