Many people, well, most people I'm sure, enjoy the Christmas season. Vacation. Gifts. Relatives. Eating. Drinking. Football. And for Christians, the birth of Jesus.
But for others, and I'm largely in your camp, all of these festivities, well-wishing, and positivity grate on their nerves, because for reasons unique to each person, the Christmas season isn't a time for celebration.
After all, as the Buddha pointed out, life is suffering. Or at least, full of disappointment. Sure, it's possible to put on a happy face and ignore this truth, but ignore it or not, that truth remains.
Many people are lonely. Many people are in pain -- physical, emotional, or both. Many people struggle for a lack of money. Many people deeply feel the sorrow of those beset by war, starvation, oppression, discrimination. There's a myriad of reasons why merry-making feels wrong around Christmas.
So I just want to say to anyone who feels that way, know that you're not alone. Since I'm one of you, by and large, here's a couple of things that made me feel better on this Christmas Eve.
First, someone shared this video by Michael Shermer in a comment on my Church of the Churchless blog. It's just a few minutes long. I liked what Shermer had to say. Basically, be here now. Enjoy the small things of life to the extent that you can.
This morning I picked up my copy of a book by a Buddhist monk, Bhante Henepola Gunaratana, Mindfulness in Plain English. These passages from the first chapter resonated with me. I'd read them several times before, but I needed a reminder of the Buddhist message.
The essence of our experience is change. Chance is incessant. Moment by moment life flows by, and it is never the same. Perpetual fluctuation is the essence of the perceptual universe. A thought springs up in your head and half a second later, it is gone. In comes another one, and then that is gone too.
A sound strikes your ears, and then silence. Open your eyes and the world pours in, blink and it is gone. People come into your life and go. Friends leave, relatives die. Your fortunes go up, and they go down. Sometimes you win, and just as often, you lose.
It is incessant: change, change, change, no two moments ever the same.
..."Suffering" is a big word in Buddhist thought. It is a key term and should be thoroughly understood. The Pali word is dukkah, and it does not just mean the agony of the body. It means that deep, subtle sense of dissatisfaction that is a part of every mind moment and that results directly from the mental treadmill.
...Sounds pretty bleak, doesn't it? Luckily, it's not -- not at all. It only sounds bleak when you view it from the ordinary mental perspective, the very perspective at which the treadmill mechanism operates. Underneath lies another perspective, a completely different way to look at the universe.
It is a level of functioning in which the mind does not try to freeze time, does not grasp onto our experience as it flows by, and does not try to block things out and ignore them. It is a level of experience beyond good and bad, beyond pleasure and pain.
It is a lovely way to perceive the world, and it is a learnable skill. It is not easy, but it can be learned.
I'm still a beginner at learning mindfulness.
But I get glimpses of what this Buddhist monk is talking about. Accept your feelings, whatever they are. Embrace your suffering, however it appears. Flow with life as best you can, even when this is difficult. Don't expect perfection of yourself, or of others, or of life. Be grateful for small pleasures.
Hi Brian
https://youtu.be/H4ZKMgLTCBI?si=CXwDFpFGYtFJj7df
Posted by: William J | December 27, 2023 at 07:04 AM