Yesterday my wife and I decided to watch the Oscars at the Northern Lights theatre pub in south Salem, rather than, per usual, sit at home with each other in front of our TV.
Carlee Wright and Tom Rastrelli, who are Statesman Journal newspaper staff, did a great job organizing and hosting the event.
We enjoyed viewing the Oscars with a bunch of other people. During commercial breaks Carlee and Tom keep everybody entertained with Academy Award trivia questions and other stuff. And the really big TV screen was cool.
Laurel and I decided to dress up. In our own fashion. We didn't have anything far-out to wear, so Laurel went with a glittery top and I dragged my rarely-worn black sports coat, tie, and slacks out of a closet.
Given how informal Salem is, I figured that this would get us at least a modicum of attention at the Northern Lights "red carpet." However, unfortunately our arrival at the theatre parking lot coincided with another couple's.
And they had a lot more going for them, fashion-wise.
The woman had on some striking very-high-heeled shoes; the guy had on bluish shoes, along with matching dark glasses frames and a like-colored shirt. I was reduced to standing aside and snapping some photos with my iPhone.
However, when I checked the Statesman Journal photos of the event, I saw that a photo of me did indeed appear. Sadly, it was just of me from the side, admiring the guy's shoes.
(Note to the Statesman Journal legal department: I realize that your photos are copyrighted, but I feel like I should be able to share a screenshot of what my computer sees when it visits your public web site. A bit of Googling revealed that putting a screenshot on a blog is indeed generally "fair use.")
So I was reduced to handing my iPhone to my wife and having her take a photo of my unusually well-dressed self. When I looked at it, though, I felt like it didn't really capture the essence of my Red Carpet persona.
After all, I'd spent a whole ten minutes getting ready for this event. I also had picked out a pair of designer dark glasses that my daughter had given me (she is the sales manager for a high-end LA-area eyewear company).
Given that my humility was already in serious question after I'd posted this tweet during the Northern Lights Oscar event, I decided that I might as well take some selfies of myself at home before my outfit went back into the closet.
A close-up shot did seem to capture a vague (OK, very vague) George Clooney'esque vibe. But I still wasn't satisfied.
Sadly, this was long after, and nowhere near, Salem's Oscar event.
It did make me feel good, though, that the cow appeared to be paying rapt attention to me, all dressed-up in my black tie outfit. Now I have a vague (OK, very vague) sense of what it is like to walk the actual Academy Awards red carpet.
Update: in a comment, someone wondered where a photo of my wife, Laurel is. Well, she doesn't like to have her photo taken as much as I do, though she should -- since she is a lot more attractive than I am.
To make amends, here's a "joint selfie" photo I took recently when I was told the New York Post needed one of both of us for the story they did on hippie retirement communities (which was largely based on one of my blog posts).
Not having a decent recent photo of the two of us, and being given a short deadline by the reporter, I took one inside our house that actually didn't turn out too bad. Mysterious looking, given our woodsy home interior, with light coming in from a hidden window.
For the photo that was used, thankfully, see: