HinesSight

Oregon Ducks win Big Ten championship! We're #1!

Wow. What a game. And what a season. The University of Oregon football team went 13-0, capping it off with a nail biter of a Big Ten championship game against Penn State that the Ducks won 45-37 tonight.

It was a highly entertaining game. Somehow I remained calm through most of it. Probably that had a lot to do with my memories of the preceding twelve games, some of which -- like Boise State and Ohio State -- were won extremely narrowly.

But somehow Oregon found a way to win. That's the mark of a great team with great coaching. They manufacture their own breaks, though I readily admit that in a game of inches, Penn State came very close to beating the Ducks.

For most of the game the Oregon secondary looked pretty weak. They kept giving up a lot of yardage on pass plays where the Penn State receiver was wide open with no defender in the vicinity. However, when it mattered most, the secondary came through, as an Oregonian story says.

The Ducks were unable to move the ball on offense, giving it back to Penn State with 2:11 left and a conference title hanging in the balance.

Nikko Reed would then write himself into Ducks lore.

The senior corner picked off Allar on a deep ball to cut Penn State’s comeback attempt short, with Oregon fans taking a beat before realizing what had happened. The Ducks offense ran the ball with success — including a key first down run on third down by Gabriel to wrap up the victory.

Now the Ducks get some well-deserved rest before playing in the Rose Bowl on New Year's Day against the #8 vs. #9 winner in the 12-team national championship playoff. Naturally Oregon will be the #1 seed, since they've been the top-ranked team for quite a few weeks and just defeated the #3 team.

I've loved not only watching Oregon play this season, but feeling that the style of the team is a wonderful reflection of our state.

Their uniforms are bright and flashy. They combine toughness with speed and finesse. Coach Lanning and his defensive coordinator are expressive and enthusiastic. The team plays cohesively, not panicking when things aren't going well, not becoming overly confident when they've got a large lead.

Win three more games, and the Ducks are national champions. It'd be terrific if that happens. If it doesn't, that won't take away from Oregon's unforgettable season.

It's tough to grow old. Government should be doing more for the elderly.

I don't want to burst any young person's aging bubble, but the plain truth is that the so-called Golden Years are anything but -- if "golden" is viewed as a blissful retired condition filled with travel, golf, and other pleasant activities that supposedly dominate life of the elderly.

Speaking as a 76 year old who has friends in their 60s, 70s, and 80s, I can confidently say that while growing old has its positive side (such as more free time), doctor visits, aches and pains, chronic medical conditions, and an increasing inability to do activities that used to be much enjoyed are irritants for most of those in my age group.

Simply put, it isn't easy growing old. Bit by bit, your body and mind are on an inexorable slide toward the finality of death. In middle age, it's possible to envision staying happy and healthy for the foreseeable future. In old age, what's foreseeable is a steady descent into ill health and the worries that come with being an increasingly unproductive member of society. 

A recent issue of The New Yorker has an article about aging, How "The Golden Girls" Celebrated -- and Distorted -- Old Age. For those too young to have watched The Golden Girls, here's a few paragraphs about the television show.

When “The Golden Girls” débuted, in 1985, one of the lead actors, Rue McClanahan, was in her fifties, and the others—Bea Arthur, Betty White, and Estelle Getty—were in their sixties. Usually, television consigned such women to unflattering supporting roles. Here, they were the stars, with nary a young or male co-star in sight. (A gay live-in cook appeared in the pilot but promptly vanished. Coco, you are not forgotten.) The feminist Betty Friedan praised the show for defying the “universal grayout of older women on network TV.”

It was the right moment. The President, Ronald Reagan, was a septuagenarian who made a show of chopping wood and riding horses. More generally, healthy seniors—the “wellderly”—were on the rise. Popular culture’s usual parade of toothless codgers and crones increasingly seemed obsolete. “The Golden Girls” (1985-92) joined a silver surge of television shows featuring energetic older protagonists, including “Murder, She Wrote” (1984-96), “Matlock” (1986-95), and Susan Harris’s “Empty Nest” (1988-95).

“The Golden Girls” was particularly adored. It ranked among the ten most watched shows for six of its seven seasons. Emmys rained down: three awards for best actress in a comedy, in three consecutive years, for White, McClanahan, and Arthur, and a supporting-actress award for Getty. In ratings and acclaim, “The Golden Girls” blew “Miami Vice” and its speedboats clear out of the water.

Not bad for a show that was almost militantly unglamorous. The Golden Girls had old-lady hair, wore loose clothes, and joked about their faltering bodies. A much loved scene, written by Harris, has the Girls considering the effect of various body positions on the sagging of their faces and breasts. There was a burlesque quality to this but also defiant pride. Here was a senior subculture, with its own fashion, politics, and humor.

I enjoyed The Golden Girls. Of course, in 1985 I was 37 years old, so I looked upon the actresses from the distance of youth, or at least incipient middle age. That was the year my mother died of a stroke at the age of 73, following a life of heavy smoking, alcoholism, liver disease, and breast cancer.

For me her death was a relief, since I knew that my highly intellectual mother wouldn't have wanted to live with a brain/mind limited by a severe stroke. I loved her, but still, in 2011 I needed to speak in a blog post of One Honest Moment.

My mother was an example of a fantasy perpetuated by The Golden Girls.

“The Golden Girls” conjures a fantasy of old age that is not only largely free of children but also largely free of doctors. Chappel notes how often the show expresses animosity toward medical institutions and, instead, solves problems with friendship. An episode about a friend languishing in a state-funded nursing home ends when the Golden Girls finance her move to an upscale facility and then resolve to “take care of each other” to the end. “The show was a celebration of self-care as an alternative to physicians’ care,” Chappel writes.

Self-care works for seniors who are basically healthy. But they aren’t always, not in real life. Estelle Getty started suffering from Lewy body dementia during the show and struggled to memorize scripts. When she flubbed lines, White would turn to the studio audience, point to Getty, and make a “she’s been drinking” gesture. When Getty requested cue cards, McClanahan remembered the cast being “appalled” by the unprofessionalism. Getty’s character, Sophia, was in her eighties yet essentially impervious. Getty herself died at eighty-four, after a long slide into incoherence.

While the AARP (American Association of Retired Persons) used to be a potent political force, I don't recall much attention being paid to the elderly in the recent election. Neither Trump nor Harris talked much about my age group, aside from the usual assurances that as president they wouldn't cut Social Security or Medicare.

Yet at the moment congressional Republicans, along with Elon Musk, who has been charged with Trump to head up a Department of Government Efficiency that has entitlement programs in its cost-cutting sights, are indeed making noises about cutting Social Security and Medicare.

But this would be a horrible thing to do, given how many seniors are heavily dependent on these programs. Actually, Medicare needs to be expanded to cover long term care and in-home care, along with dental and vision benefits that go beyond the paltry coverage in MedicareAdvantage programs, which I believe is still better than what traditional Medicare offers.

The New Yorker article makes a great point.

Tom Cruise in his sixties is the face (the otherworldly, well-moisturized face) of an aging society in denial. The effects are spelled out in institutions. Chappel observes that, although the United States boasts “a relatively developed and successful” system for healthy older people, its support for those requiring long-term assistance is “catastrophically underdeveloped.”

Families that don’t qualify for Medicaid pay small fortunes, not infrequently draining their savings, to get professional care. Nursing homes, meanwhile, are understaffed and poorly regulated. Their inadequacies became clear with covid-19. Fourteen states saw more than ten per cent of their nursing-home population die of the virus in the year 2020 alone.

One might expect politicians to do something. They are, after all, quite old themselves. The average age in the Senate is now sixty-seven. Recent Presidents have been older. The baby boom refers to those born within an eighteen-year span, yet there was a twenty-eight-year run of boomer Presidents, broken only by Joe Biden, a pre-boomer. (We will now return to boomers.)

But age has not compelled action, and federal long-term care remains essentially what it was in the sixties, even as the elderly population has ballooned. Politicians seem as afflicted with age denialism as everyone else.

Broadband is coming to Oregon's unserved areas, but slowly

A few days ago I decided to see whether there was anything new being reported by the Oregon Broadband Office, a state agency charged with overseeing projects to bring decently fast broadband to people in this state who lack it.

That includes my neighborhood in rural south Salem. Though we're only six miles or so from the Salem city limits, Oregon's capital, the only wired/fixed broadband (as contrasted with cellular broadband) available out here is crappy CenturyLink DSL that comes over ancient copper phone lines at the sluggish speed of 6-7 Mbps down and 1-2 Mbps up.

This is a far cry from the minimal broadband standard of 25 Mbps down and 3 Mbps up. And until I was able to bring DSL to our area in 2008 by writing a plaintive letter to the CEO of Qwest, the predecessor to CenturyLink, we had to use a glitchy satellite service, WildBlue, while neighbors of ours had to make do with dial-up.

Currently my wife and I enjoy Space X's Starlink broadband, which we've had since January 2021, when I became a Starlink beta tester. Since, Starlink has become much faster and more reliable as many more satellites are launched into low orbit. That's great, but I'd much rather have fiber optic broadband -- which is considerably better than Starlink's $120/month service. (Starlink speeds vary quite a bit; at the moment I'm getting 123 Mbps down and 17 Mbps up.)

I noticed a November 12, 2024 press release on the Oregon Broadband Office web site about $133 million being awarded to broadband projects in Oregon. Marion County, where I live, was to get $8,356,701 for 1,007 locations. That got me excited, until I checked out a map of the projects and saw that Ziply Fiber would be installing fiber optic on the east side of I-5 near us, while our neighborhood is a few miles west of I-5.

So close, yet so far. That spurred me to send a message to the Oregon Broadband Office:

I contacted your office before, wondering when our woefully broadband underserved area of several hundred homes out here in rural south Salem would benefit from the federal programs to expand broadband access.

From what I can tell after just looking at your site, Ziply Fiber has a contract nearby, on the east side of I-5, while we’re several miles from that area on the west side of I-5. So it looks like even though most of our neighbors suffer with 6-7 Mbps DSL from CenturyLink, the only option widely available other than Starlink, which we have and pay $120 a month for, there’s no plan for our neighborhood to get faster and cheaper broadband.

Please let me know if my gloomy assessment of the situation is correct. As I told one of your staff before, I’ve looked into every conceivable broadband option, including cellular broadband, and have come up with exactly zero options to DSL other than satellite internet, which I have.

I’ve noted that Starlink wasn’t eligible for federal grants to improve broadband access because the service was too expensive and too slow. So it’s frustrating that aside from crappy DSL, the only option I and many other neighbors have is Starlink and HughesNet, two satellite services that don’t qualify under federal rules as viable broadband. 

How long are we supposed to wait for “real” broadband? I’m 76, so I'm suspecting I’ll be dead before that happens in our neighborhood, though I’d enjoy getting some positive news from your office.

I got a quick reply from a staffer who I'd talked with before, Brian McGuirk. We set up a time to talk by phone last Tuesday. Once again, McGuirk was helpful, friendly, and informative. He told me that the $133 million was from the 2021 ARPA (American Rescue Plan Act).

So it's taken more than three years for that money to be allocated to broadband projects in Oregon. Given how the federal bureaucracy works, I suppose this is reasonable. McGuirk said that a much larger pot of broadband money is coming from the 2021 Infrastructure and Jobs Act, which contains $65 billion nationally for broadband. 

I found a June 14, 2024 story from our local newspaper, the Statesman Journal, "Oregon's 'Internet for All' application approved." 

Nearly a year after announcing Oregon would receive $688 million for the improvement and expansion of affordable, high-speed internet, the National Telecommunications and Information Administration said Thursday that the state can now request access to funding to begin administering the program.

A pre-pandemic study estimated 1.7 million Oregonians live in rural areas without access to high-speed broadband.

Nick Batz, director of the Oregon Broadband Office, said while the state generally has good connectivity, establishing access in those under or unserved areas is challenging.

The story said that the program is expected to be implemented over the next four years and completed by 2028. Well, I'll be 80 then. So maybe I'll live to see fiber optic at our house. Until then, I'm thankful for Starlink, which has made our broadband life much happier after we were able to ditch archaic DSL.

McGuirk told me about an area in rural Washingon County that is in the same DSL situation as our neighborhood is. After a bit of Googling, I came up with a 2020 story, "Is fiber coming to rural western Washington County? Perhaps, says Ziply." But that area still doesn't have fiber.

The rural portions of Washington County have always struggled to gain access to high speed internet, with some regions solely relying on satellite or microwave options, while others are on copper lines now owned by Ziply Fiber, which acquired the former network of the struggling Frontier Communications operation in Oregon, Washington, Idaho and Montana on May 1 of this year.

...The Frontier network for rural residents in far western Washington County has been a constant source of frustration for years, with technical issues plaguing the aging network and often poor customer service being a hallmark of their legacy. With the acquisition of the network by Ziply, a new company, is there a future in western Washington County where internet connectivity comes in the way of fiber instead of copper? Perhaps, says the company. 

I'm enjoying Bluesky after my disillusionment with Elon Musk's X

A few days ago I took the social media plunge into the pleasant waters of Bluesky, having become increasingly disillusioned with X (formerly known as Twitter). 

After Elon Musk bought Twitter and almost instantly renamed it X, because that's his favorite letter, I found this irritating, but not enough to make me leave X. The positives seemed to outweigh the negatives.

I use Twitter, X, and now Bluesky for the enjoyment I get from following quality observers of our local, state, and national political scenery. They're up to date on what's going on. I learn a lot from the links they share, along with their own commentary on current events.

After I wake up, I like to see what those I follow are viewing as the day's most important news. Because my list of follows is strongly biased toward Democrats and progressives, they resonate with my own similar political leaning. 

Though I've never met any of them, they come to seem like friends of a sort. Each has their own unique style and area of expertise. 

Though for months I've been hearing talk on X about people leaving for other similar platforms like Threads and Bluesky, after signing up for Threads and then ignoring it, I'd decided that I'd stick with X for the time being.

Then came Elon Musk's full-bore support for Trump. Since I have followed Musk on Twitter and then X because I admire what he's done with Tesla and SpaceX (I'm a longtime Starlink customer), I was aware of how different his recent posts on X were from the Elon Musk posts before he became a big Trump supporter. 

Those new posts were full of lies. Then came his efforts to get Trump elected. Now Trump has given Musk the job of figuring out ways to make the federal government more efficient through a Department of Government Efficiency -- DOGE, which not coincidentally is the name of a crypto currency, Dogecoin, that Musk is heavily invested in.

The conflicts of interest Musk has are breathtaking. SpaceX and Tesla benefit mightily from government programs, yet there's no indication that Musk is going to take steps to make sure that his DOGE recommendations on where to cut government spending aren't in line with what enriches Musk.

So along with many other users of X, I've decided to wean myself off of Musk's social media plaything in favor of Bluesky, a haven for people who are fed up with the MAGA craziness X has become. The ads on X are equally annoying, as Musk has taken away the ability to block specific ads. So far, Bluesky doesn't have ads. 

I kept my X username when I signed up for Bluesky: OregonBrian. Many of the people and organizations I follow on X aren't on Bluesky, but quite a few are. Currently I follow 59 Bluesky users. I had 701 followers on X; now I have 9 on Bluesky. I've invited my followers to join me on Bluesky, but obviously most haven't done this.

But since I'm much more interested in reading the posts of other people and organizations than sharing my own posts, which usually are just links to a blog post that I write each night, I'm fine with being almost follower'less on Bluesky.

It feels great to be out of the clutches of Elon Musk's X, though I'm still on X for a while longer. Blue Sky has the look and feel of X without the annoyances. Give it a try. Bluesky has over 20 million users now, a big jump from before the election. It isn't difficult to find people and organizations to follow on virtually any topic.

Constant worrying about Trump is a threat to your health

Like many millions of Americans, ever since Trump was elected president on November 5, a mere twelve days ago that seems like much longer, I've been consumed with anxiety about what this means for the United States and the world.

In short, nothing good. Or at least, very little that is good.

Naturally I'm speaking from my perspective as a Democrat who heartily supported Kamala Harris. I realize that Trump supporters feel differently. But I'm speaking to those who, like me, see Trump as a threat to democracy, the environment, equal rights, justice, the economy, Ukraine, and so much else. 

We have to resist Trump whenever and wherever possible. That's a given. However, we can't constantly worry about what Trump will do in the next four years. That way isn't good for our mental and physical health. 

And it's important that we remain strong -- to fight the good fight against Trump's malevolent authoritarianism.

Maybe you've heard of the book, Why Zebras Don't Get Ulcers. It's about stress. Humans and other animals are hard-wired by evolution to react strongly when faced with imminent danger, like a lion stalking a herd of zebras.

When the lion attacks, the zebras run like crazy. Hormones in their brain and body are instantly released to aid them in escaping from the threat to their life. But after the attack is over, the zebras return to grazing. 

That's how the sympathetic nervous system was intended to work. In his book, Mind Magic, neuroscientist and neurosurgeon James Doty says about the autonomic nervous system:

This part of the nervous system developed early in our evolution as a species and has two divisions. The first to evolve was the sympathetic nervous system (SNS), whose job it is to ensure our physical survival and the survival of our genes, and whose primary activity is to engage the fight, flight, or freeze response. 

...Because it evolved to act in life-or-death situations, it moves along very short neurons and therefore has the power to completely commandeer our physical and emotional resources in a split second, filling our body with stress hormones like cortisol and tensing our muscles for action.

Later, the human nervous system evolved further with the addition of the parasympathetic nervous system (PNS), also known as the rest-and-digest response, whose job is to return the body to a peaceful resting state, a process known as homeostasis. 

The switch to rest-and-digest is accompanied by a wide variety of physiological changes to promote balance and harmony: our muscles relax, our heart rate and blood pressure decrease, and we produce more saliva for digestion.

Nature didn't intend that we be in a constant state of anxious arousal. Our brain and body are basically unchanged from prehistoric times when early humans, like zebras, were faced with dire life-or-death threats that required a rapid fight, flight, or freeze response, soon followed by a rest-and-digest response (assuming the threat didn't end in death).

We live in a very different world now. Few of us have direct threats to our life. Instead, our modern world is filled with situations that provoke feelings of anxiety in us, such as the election of a president, Donald Trump, who is viewed by many as posing a serious threat to values they hold dear.

Instead of going back to grazing on what sustains us, as zebras do after a threat appears and disappears, often we remain in a stressful state -- because what we fear isn't a near-at-hand danger that can be dealt with, but a distant danger outside of our control.

James Doty goes on to say:

The problem is that while evolution takes millions of years to adapt to environmental change, humans have profoundly changed our environment in only a few thousand years. In fact, we lived as hunter-gatherers in groups of fifty to a hundred until only six to eight thousand years ago.

Unfortunately, today's fast-paced and anxiety-provoking world is riddled with the sorts of uncertainties and frustrations that trigger the fight, flight, or freeze response and keep it chronically activated by unreal, imagined, or insignificant threats. 

Essentially, we are responding to a passive-aggressive comment in a colleague's email through the same system that was designed to process a saber-toothed tiger attack. As we will see, the chronic activation of the fight, flight, or freeze response and its release of inflammatory proteins has damaging effects on the body, including an increase in heart disease and a weakened immune system.

I don't see Trump as an imagined or insignificant threat. He's a clear and present danger to not only the United States, but the world as a whole. Like I said, when there's an opportunity to resist him, we need to do what demands to be done. 

But we can't remain on guard against Trump all the time. He can't be a constant inhabitant of our mind. We can't react to every crazy thing he does as if it was a saber-toothed tiger attack. We need to keep informed about what he and his administration are up to, while engaging in activities that relax and rejuvenate us as much as possible.

Everybody who opposes Trump will have to find their own ways of doing this. I've meditated every day since 1969, when I started learning yoga while in college. Currently I enjoy brief guided meditations rather than the hour or two of meditation that I used to practice.

On my iPhone I switch back and forth between Sam Harris' Waking Up app and the Calm app. Today I went back to listening to the Daily Calm, which I find more relaxing than the daily guided meditation offered by Waking Up. 

Trump is going to do what he's going to do. Yes, that's a tautology. But it reminds me that by and large, it's going to be up to leading Democrats in Congress and various states to stand in Trump's way when he poses a danger. 

I can support those efforts. Yet I can't let my mental and physical health be threatened by constant worries about what Trump has done, is doing, and will do. I've got to graze on the pleasant grass in my life, not be incessantly looking around for threats from a president who isn't anywhere near me, physically.

Trader Joe's has brought back the Turkey-Less Stuffed Roast for 2024!

Thank you, Trader Joe's!!!

Those three exclamation marks don't begin to describe the joy I felt when I learned that the Breaded Turkey-less Stuffed Roast has returned for 2024 holiday eating, after being discontinued in 2023. 

In November 2023 I sadly wrote, "Bummer! Trader Joe's Breaded Turkey-less Stuffed Roast discontinued for 2023." That post started out with:

Oh, Trader Joe's, I'm so disappointed that you have put a piece of metaphorical coal in my vegetarian stocking this 2023 holiday season by discontinuing your marvelous vegan Breaded Turkey-less Stuffed Roast -- which is the favorite meatless alternative of its kind for my wife and me.

I bought several extra last year and put them in our freezer. Here's a photo of one of the last survivors of the Breaded Turkey-less Stuffed Roast purge before I took it out of the box and put it in an oven for Thanksgiving dinner. Now we're down to zero. Sob...

Yesterday I looked for the roast in the frozen food section of our Salem, Oregon store. Not seeing it, I mentioned to my checkout person that I was disappointed that the Turkey-less Stuffed Roast wasn't available again this year.

To my surprise, and pleasure, she said, "We have it. Want me to show you where it is?" "Absolutely," I told her. Somehow I'd walked right by it.

Not only did I buy one, I bought three. One for our meatless Thanksgiving, one for our meatless Christmas Eve, and one to have in the freezer whenever my wife and I want to eat it at some other time.

The check-out person said she wasn't sure if the ingredients had changed. They haven't. I included the photo below in my 2023 blog post. I just compared those ingredients and nutrition facts with the 2024 version of the roast. They're exactly the same. Trader Joe's was wise not to mess with a good product.

I ended my 2023 post this way. It's great that Trader Joe's realized that the Turkey-less Roast was much beloved, so a replacement wasn't called for. All that needed to be done was bring back the roast. 

But all is not lost. In a November 8, 2023 story, VegNews reported on the much-beloved Breaded Turkey-less Stuffed Roast being discontinued by Trader Joe's. There's hope.

VegNews reached out to Trader Joe’s and the company has confirmed that the product is discontinued and they will not have a meat-free roast offering this year. 

The cult-favorite holiday product will not return to shelves this holiday season because “it wasn’t meeting expectations,” according to one Reddit user. Some commenters suggested the reason might be because the recipe changed at some point and it was never as good as the original. 

However, store managers have told customers that a replacement could come to stores in 2024. 

“The notes in the internal system do say we are sourcing a replacement for 2024, it just didn’t come together this year,” another Reddit user confirmed. 

LOVERS OF THE ROAST, TAKE ACTION! Head to the Trader Joe's Product Feedback page. Tell them that you adore the Breaded Turkey-less Stuffed Roast more than life itself. Or if you prefer life to the roast -- my personal view, since if I'm not alive, I can't enjoy the roast -- tell Trader Joe's that you hope so much for a return of the roast, or a new and improved version, in 2024.

My wife's shoulder replacement surgery is helping me be a better person

When it comes to being a caring, compassionate person, I'd say that I'm about average.

I know people who are much more caring and compassionate than I am, and I also know people who are considerably less caring and compassionate. So I've got room to grow in this regard.

However, at the age of 76, I pretty much figured that I was set in my ways and wouldn't be improving my caring and compassionate quotient any time soon.

That was before my wife, Laurel, had shoulder replacement surgery. More accurately, reverse shoulder replacement surgery.

The difference between a reverse prosthesis and a standard shoulder replacement is that in a reverse prosthesis, the ball is placed on the socket side of the joint. This is opposite of where it is located in nature, or “reverse” of what you would expect. The socket is then placed on the arm side where it is supported by a metal stem in the arm bone (the humerus).

About ten years ago, I think it was, Laurel had surgery to repair a torn rotator cuff in her right shoulder. When it got torn again, my wife had to decide whether to go through another surgery, this time a total replacement of the shoulder. 

She wasn't wild about the prospect of needing to wear a sling for around a month and go through the physical therapy needed for her to make best use of a new shoulder. But this was the wisest thing to do, so last Tuesday she had the surgery on an outpatient basis from her Salem Health doctor. 

It went well. Now we're in the post-surgery recovery mode, which has been difficult for Laurel. The first 48 hours she was icing her shoulder via a machine for 40 minutes on and 20 minutes off. That meant sitting and sleeping in a recliner chair.

She was given several prescriptions to deal with pain and inflammation, along with other medications to dealt with the side effects of the prescriptions. In short, not fun, to put it mildly. 

As with her first surgery, I'm Laurel's caregiver. She needs quite a bit of care. Basically I'm her right arm whenever she needs to do something that requires two arms. Which is a lot of stuff. Until someone has lost the use of an arm, you don't realize how difficult it is to do previously simple things.

Here's how I put my caregiving in a post on my Church of the Churchless blog, where I write more philosophically than on this blog and my Salem Political Snark blog.

Until you can't use an arm for much, it's difficult to know all the things you won't be able to do anymore. We're rediscovering those things, since Laurel had rotator cuff surgery on the same arm about ten years ago that also required her to use a sling for a month. Of course, we were a decade younger then, so everything is a bit tougher now that we're in our mid-70s rather than mid-60s.

I've been having to do a lot more around the house than I usually do.

For example, Laurel used to walk our dog in the morning and I did it most afternoons. Now I handle both walks. We shared cooking duties before her surgery. Now I have to help Laurel with her meals, unless it's a simple one that doesn't require two hands. For the first 48 hours my wife was constantly using a machine with a timer to ice her shoulder, 40 minutes on, 20 minutes off. My job was to rotate three sets of 12 frozen water bottles into the machine every eight hours, making sure a thoroughly frozen set always was available.

What I've discovered from all this extra taking care of Laurel is that the more I'm focused on her needs, the less it bothers me when something goes wrong in my life. This both surprised and pleased me. The first time it happened, it felt like I'd taken a pill that reduced the sensation of the problem I was having by about half. 

Meaning, what used to irritate me considerably now irritated me only a little. It was as if constantly putting Laurel's needs before my own, even for just a couple of days, considerably lowered the feeling of Me I normally carry around. Having less Me rattle around in my mind, and more She (my wife), left less for an irritation to latch onto. 

Also, after six days of caregiving, I've been pleased that aside from a single instance where I got a bit testy with Laurel and had to apologize to her for that, I've been able to be caring and compassionate toward my wife to a greater degree than I anticipated. 

I hadn't realized that putting a loved one's needs before my own, which I readily admit should be my habitual way of acting, but hasn't been, can become a habit. It's sort of like I hadn't exercised my caring and compassionate mental muscle before, or at least not to the extent I'm doing it now (the exception being my wife's previous shoulder surgery).

So all in all, I'm feeling good both about Laurel's prospect for getting back almost complete use of her right shoulder, and my capability for learning how to be a more consistently caring and compassionate person. Of course, only time will tell how both things go.

Oregon football pulls out an exciting win over Ohio State

My heart still hasn't recovered from the closing minutes of Oregon's thrilling 32-31 victory over Ohio State in a battle of #3 versus #2. After tonight, Oregon should be the second ranked team in the country, maybe even close to the top spot, a major accomplishment given the mediocre play from Oregon in its first two games.

Sports writer John Canzano captured my feeling exactly in his "The Bald Faced Truth" substack post (I'm a subscriber) as the talented Ohio State quarterback took the field in the last few minutes of the game, needing only a field goal to pull out a win.

EUGENE — It sure was something on Saturday night to see Oregon fans storm the field and Chip Kelly storm the press box elevator at the end of regulation.

Final: Oregon 32, Ohio State 31.

The biggest win of the Dan Lanning era.

No question mark there. None needed. Because Lanning’s Ducks took possession of the Big Ten Conference penthouse with a gritty, gutsy, never-say-die victory at Autzen Stadium. It wasn’t perfect. Nor easy. But the win came just the same, and it was accompanied by some national respect for the UO program.

Kelly, Ohio State’s mercenary play-caller, was down by a point when his offense got the ball. He had 107 seconds, three timeouts, and a trusted kicker. I don’t blame you if you shook your head, turned off the TV, and headed to bed. Or maybe just covered your eyes with the sofa pillows.

Kelly vs. the Ducks defense with the game on the line?

I was totally prepared for Kelly and Ohio State to come out on top. It just looked like one of those agonizingly close losses in important games was going to bite the Ducks in the butt again. But poor clock management by Ohio State in the closing seconds saved Oregon.

Inexplicably, the Ohio State quarterback kept the ball and ran up the middle when there was just six seconds left in the game. Canzano wrote:

I’d wondered all week if it would come down to the grandmaster chess player against his old school. We’d seen Kelly win a pile of games during his tenure in Eugene. He and Buckeyes’ head coach Ryan Day presented a formidable challenge for Lanning and his youthful staff, particularly defensive coordinator Tosh Lupoi.

Lupoi is an elite recruiter who happens to also be Oregon’s defensive playcaller. Kelly loathes recruiting but can work the back of a napkin at a coaching clinic with the best around. That contrast and the sky-high stakes provided terrific theater on Saturday.

It wasn’t lost on me that Oregon’s Jabbar Muhammad, a transfer cornerback from Washington, deflected a critical pass on the second-to-last play of the game. Or that when Ohio State quarterback Will Howard decided to tuck the ball and run with the final seconds ticking away, he was being chased by players Lupoi recruited, developed, and put on the field.

Howard ran, slid, and then looked up at the clock.

Timeout?

Too late — “0:00.”

This was Oregon's big entrance into the Big Ten. I've got to admit that the scary reputation of Ohio State, which had beaten every opponent easily up to now, made me hope that at least Oregon would keep the final score close so if they lost, they wouldn't sink far in the rankings.

But the Ducks pulled it out -- even with a botched extra point, a failed two-point conversion to make up for the missed extra point, a missed field goal, and a deeply irritating ejection from the game of Oregon receiver Traeshon Holden when he spit in the face of an Ohio State defender after making a catch near the goal line, which led to a 15 yard unsportsmanlike conduct penalty that took away the chance for a touchdown when the Ducks had to settle for a field goal. 

That four point difference between a touchdown and field goal was very much on my mind as Ohio State started its final possession just one point behind, since an Ohio State field goal would win it for them. I have no doubt that one of the happiest people in Autzen Stadium after the Ducks' victory was Holden, since if they had lost, his spit in the face would have gone down in Oregon football history as one of the stupidest moves ever by a Duck in an important game.

It still was really stupid. But at least it didn't cost Oregon the game. If Oregon can beat one of the top teams in the country after making preventable errors, the rest of the season looks really promising for the Ducks. 

Regence and Salem Health are in an annoying contract dispute

Recently I got a not-so-cheery letter from Cheryl Nester Wolfe, President and CEO of Salem Health Hospitals and Clinics.

She informed me, along with many thousands of other people in Salem who get their health insurance through Regence Blue Cross Blue Shield of Oregon that Salem Health's contract with Regence expires on December 31, 2024 and "despite repeated attempts to negotiate a new contract for 2025, Regence refuses to agree to fair market terms."

Wolfe put most of another sentence in boldface to draw attention to it.

This means that as a patient, you will likely be responsible for a greater portion of the costs of your care at all Salem Health Hospitals and Clinics locations after December 31, 2024.

Yesterday the Salem Reporter had an informative story about this dispute, "Salem Health seeks 35% increase from Regence in insurance coverage dispute." Here's how the story begins:

Thousands in Salem may not be able to get in-network care at Salem Health next year due to a contract dispute between the hospital system and insurance company Regence BlueCross BlueShield.

Both sides say the disagreement, centered around how much the insurance company pays Salem Health to care for patients, may be insurmountable. 

Salem Health is seeking a 35% increase in the amount it bills Regence when members go to the emergency room or have surgery at Salem’s only hospital.

Hospital leaders said that’s necessary to keep up with inflation, while Regence said it would drastically raise premiums for members.

If a deal isn’t settled, Regence patients would pay more out-of-pocket for appointments, surgeries and care at Salem Health’s hospitals and clinics.

Federal law protects patients from paying out-of-network prices for emergency care, including airlifts.

This is really annoying. I'm on Medicare, so have the Regence MedAdvantage plan. The monthly cost is reasonable, $72 a month. I've been happy with the plan, which I've had for ten years, ever since I became eligible for Medicare.

I got a MedAdvantage plan in part because just before I turned 65, I semi-jokingly asked my Salem Health family physician if she was going to kick me out after I had Medicare, since I knew that medical providers complain about Medicare's reimbursement rates. She said that her clinic loses money on regular Medicare visits but they break even, or maybe a bit better, with MedAdvantage. 

Today I phoned Regence, being more than a little concerned about the statement in the Salem Reporter story that the disagreement between Regence and Salem Health may be insurmountable. The open enrollment period for MedAdvantage plans ends December 7, so I wanted to start looking into other options if Regence and Salem Health can't agree on a 2025 contract.

The woman I talked with at Regence was pleasant and seemingly knowledgeable. She told me that contract disputes happen all the time between insurance companies and providers, but usually they aren't as public as this one. She said that if Regence doesn't have a Salem Health contract by November 18, I think it was, they'd have to send out a letter to their Salem customers stating this.

I told her that since my deadline is December 7 to sign up for a different MedAdvantage plan, that's cutting it kind of close. She then told me that between January 1 and March 31 Medicare allows one switch of MedAdvantage plans, which often occurs because someone chooses a new plan during the fall open enrollment period, then finds they don't like that plan.

This applies even if no change has been made to a MedAdvantage plan. Meaning, I could dump Regence and enroll in a different plan between January and March. However, she added that the change doesn't take effect until the first of the next month after a change is made, which means I could have no MedAdvantage plan at all for a while if I switched from Regence early next year.

I don't want to run that risk, given the ever-present possibility of a serious accident or illness popping up. So I'm strongly leaning toward switching to a different MedAdvantage plan prior to December 7. My wife has Providence MedAdvantage through her PERS retirement health plan. She likes Providence, though no insurance plan is perfect.

Understand: I don't trust either Regence or Salem Health.

I told the woman at Regence who I talked with today that this reminds me of the disputes that regularly surface with DirecTV, which we have to use because we live in a rural area lacking cable. When, say, ESPN goes off the air due to a lack of a contract, DirecTV says it is because ESPN is being greedy, and I should complain to ESPN. Of course, ESPN says it is because DirecTV is being greedy, and I should complain to DirecTV.

My attitude is that I don't care who's at fault, I just want ESPN back so I can watch sports. Likewise, I don't care who's at fault between Regence and Salem Health, I just want health care.

It's crazy that even after joining Medicare, I still have to deal with corporate contract disputes. Our country's health care system is screwed up. Even if we had Medicare For All, so long as the profit motive dominates, patients are going to suffer from giant corporations arguing about how much money each of them is going to make. 

My 76th birthday has me thinking about sending death letters before I die

For a while I've been pondering the notion of sending death letters to friends, family, and other people important to me -- not letters to be delivered after I die, but while I'm very much alive, not even sick. 

This idea has gained strength as I approach my 76th birthday. That sounds damn old to me. Which, it is.

My sister died at 71. My mother died at 73. My father, almost entirely absent from my life, died at 73 (best I can estimate; I'm not sure about the exact age).

So while I'm pretty healthy at the moment, having taken better care of myself than those relatives, I still sort of feel like I've living on borrowed time. After all, usually we have no way of knowing when we'll take our last breath.

Accidents happen. Unexpected heart attacks happen. Murders happen. The only way death is known in advance is if we commit suicide or if we have a fatal disease whose course is predictable.

My sister and mother died without me being able to speak with them. My father, the same, though we were so distant, I might not have wanted to talk with him before his death. 

I regret not being able to tell my sister and mother how much I loved them and would miss them. Hopefully they knew this, but we weren't a super-intimate family. I never told them things that I now wish I had, such as regrets about how I could have been a better brother or son, and my appreciation for all they did for me which, in retrospect, I took for granted more than I should have.

That's my motivation for writing individualized death letters to people I care about and sending them out while I'm alive and well, aside from some chronic health problems that are annoying rather than life-threatening. 

The letters would be a reflection of my deep feelings for these people. They'd allow me to say things more honestly and directly than I'm able to do in my usual communications with them. I'd imagine that I was on my death bed, even though I wouldn't be. What would I want to say to each of them if I knew that I only had fifteen minutes of living left?

For sure it wouldn't be aimless chit-chat. It would be heartfelt, real, emotional.

That's the spirit I'll try to put myself in when I write the death letters. Of course, if I end up living quite a bit longer, I might want to write a second death letter to some people. (The Social Security Administration says a 76 year old man lives another ten years, on average.)

I wouldn't expect a response to the death letters.

In fact, I see this as a downside of sending them while I'll alive, because I don't want people to think that I'm looking for them to say nice things about me after I've said nice things about them. However, to be honest, it wouldn't bother me if that happened. I just have no expectation of it happening, as I want my words to reflect how I feel about the person, not how I want them to feel about how I feel.

Anyway, this is something I'm planning to pursue over the coming months.

If I ever have a sudden massive heart attack or find a big semi-truck about to hit my little Subaru head on, I don't want my last thought to be, Damn, I never told _____ how much I care about them.  I'd rather have it simply be, Fuck! I'm about to die!