Over on one of my other blogs, HinesSight, yesterday I shared some thoughts about getting together with a friend, as we have been doing for many years, for coffee and conversation.
Have a read: "Having coffee with an old friend on Father's Day is a great gift."
Here's how I introduced the post on Facebook.
Hey, I'm actually sharing my feelings about how much I've enjoyed getting together with Jim Ramsey, an old friend, for 49 years. Of course, being a man, I'm going to send him a link to this blog post rather than tell him in person how I feel.
As a bonus, I also copied in a post from 2005 that i still like a lot, "Why men don't share their feelings." Here's how it starts out:
--------------------
“How’re you doing?” says Dennis as I walk into the Pacific Martial Arts changing room. Instead of replying with my habitual robotic “Fine, how’re you?” I have a crazy impulse to actually tell him. I’ll share my feelings!
“Well, my feet have been tingling for about a week. I don’t know what’s going on. I’ve got an appointment to see a doctor tomorrow.” Without missing a beat (appropriately: Dennis is a drummer) I hear, “You’ve got a brain tumor. No doubt about it. You’re going to die.”
For the rest of our hour and a half training session, whenever I stop to check on how my feet are doing Dennis again says, “Oh yeah, you’ve got a brain tumor. Your time is up.”
Sensei Warren, our regular martial arts instructor, came in late. After telling him my tale of tingling feet I got a marginally better prognosis: “You’ve got diabetic neuropathy. No doubt about it. You’re going to lose your feet.” And I don’t even have diabetes.
Now, I know both Dennis and Warren care a lot about me. They demonstrated their manly concern by telling me that I’m either going to die or lose my feet. If one of them had given me a big hug and said “Don’t worry, everything is going to be all right,” I would have begun to worry that he had a brain tumor.
Not sure if ther are any comments here yet, but I'll take a crack at it...Man that male bonding can be a hastle.
This thread reminds me of a day at satsang. Actually, it had not started yet, and people were still
in conversations so I went to give a hug to the guy who gave me such great advice on the, Life is Fair book -who happened to be walking by.
I wanted give the type of hug one gives to his brother, good friend or father. You know, with a pat on the back but briefly. To my surprise the guy deflected it almost like a shove.
I thought maybe he's having a bad day? But in all actuality the satsang was just about to begin and he was giving today's presentation. "Ah, I thought. Didn't know he was on his way up stage."
He gave a discourse and it was WEAK. Just kidding, no I haven't yet been to a discourse that I thought wasn't exemplary. Anyhow, it had been awhile since I'd seen the guy as I don't always attend and most times just read something like one or two chapters of 'Spiritual Link'.
But on this occasion, I had requested a Initiation Re-sitting where we crossed paths again. The one who originally initiated me on behalf of Baba Ji, forever in his debt. Being a hour and a half late and the advanced satsangi Dr. Saverese stalled out that initiation, knowing I had searched for over 20 years, and that day walked from Santa Rosa to Petaluma roughly 23mi for RSSB's full Surat-Shabd-Yoga form to add to my knowledge; Reiki, Hatha Yoga, Staring at a White Wall meditations, etc.
In short, I was late and missed some things and had to skim read the introduction so the meditation instructions could start reasonably. Back to the Re-sitting, the guy who gave me some great advice before saw me there, but as soon as I learned what I had missed from the original I got up to quietly leave. The gentleman rushed to see if I needed anything and to reach out.
Perhaps he thought I was upset about the bump that happened at his discourse months back. But I whispered, "No, no I have what I missed at the original initiation." Also thanking him before exiting a second set of doors.
Sometimes I guess that male bonding just doesn't work.
Posted by: Karim W. Rahmaan | June 23, 2020 at 07:44 PM
:0)!!!
Posted by: s* | June 24, 2020 at 12:51 AM
I love this "Now, I know both Dennis and Warren care a lot about me. They demonstrated their manly concern by telling me that I’m either going to die or lose my feet." Cracks me up laughing. Typical male, practical and down to earth. I have three sons and they are also blunt and honest and I wouldn't change them even if I could!
Posted by: Jen | June 24, 2020 at 04:32 PM