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February 14, 2019


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YOU say: "So I just sit in as much inward silence as my meditation allows, and wait for God to show up.
God, if you exist, it’s up to you to show yourself to me, since there are so many ways people have used to find you, they can’t all be correct.”

**I'm just reiterating what Buddhists have been saying for centuries. I have been saying the same thing on this blog for years and years. Nothing original about it, but I'll say it again..

God doesn't show up because it is what is looking.

If you ever see God, beat him with a pvc pipe, because it is an imposter. Anything objective is not real. God is not a thing. It might help not to think of yourself as an atheist. Don't think of yourself as anything at all.

By now, after hearing and reading this stuff for years and years this must seem to be cliche', unsatisfying and meaningless. You want more. Something tangible. It's frustrating all this trying to no avail.

Kwai Chang Cain in the old TV series was asked, "What do you do".

Cain shrugs his shoulders, "I live".

YOU say: "seemingly God also would like my attitude of “I want to know you, but it’s your job to make the connection.”

**It's not that God is being difficult, it's just that here is no connection to make. There is nothing separate to be known. Who is there to know it? What you think you are is just memories. There is just a sparkling* in this very instant as a non-thing.

*Everyone is probably tired of the commonly used phrase for this.."radiance".

YOU say: "And if there is some kind of afterlife that’s anything like what people think, it will probably be cooler than the cool stuff we did here, so the stuff we did here will pale in comparison. "

-- This is the afterlife and the forelife. There is always just this.

You could say that at death you enter the undifferentiated state without dualistic relativity, as the Entirety. As that you may remain or continue manifesting as this and that, in some cases struggling to find out what is being discussed here. Or, as something else.

Eternity moves
Space becomes
Time appears
Dualism appears
The universe appears
You identify as a relative object in manifestation.

Eternity rests
Space disappears
Time is no more
Dualism is no more
There are no objects
The universe disappears
You are but there is no you

Above I paraphrased Wei Wu Wei

Whatever can be said has been said before.

Quote Brian : "So I just sit in as much inward silence as my meditation allows, and wait for God to show up."

That's kind of poignant. I can empathize.

In a way, this is like being in love. Of course, if your beloved returns your love, then that's the end to it. Again, if she doesn't, and you are able to move on fully, that too is the end of it. Third case: You see no indication of your love being reciprocated, nor is there any direct indication that it isn't, and so, if your love is true enough and deep enough, then -- even in the teeth of a lack of 'evidence' -- you keep persevering, and you keep hoping, while at one level recognizing that all of this may be in vain.

Thus with this God business. There are those who find confirmation of God (let's not go into whether that confirmation is real or imagined, real or delusion, that's a separate discussion). Then there are those who, on not finding confirmation, simply move on from the God question, dwelling no more on this issue. (And of course, one related category would be igtheists who'd never ever concerned themselves with the God question at all, ever). And finally, the third category: those who're clear-headed and recognize that there's no evidence for God, who are decidedly atheistic, but who nevertheless do not quite "move on", not quite. There still remains some hope, and they still persevere, in their own way.

I myself have moved on from theism (never wholly unquestioning theism, never quite blind faith, but theism nevertheless); on to wholly on-the-fence agnosticism; to soft atheism; and further to (selective) hard atheism (that is, my atheism is soft in many instances, but on the other hand I've now begun to find hard atheism to be the reasonable stance in many other cases).

Nevertheless there still is yearning, there still is hope. No delusion, none: and I clearly recognize that chances are there'll be no nothing behind the curtain; nevertheless, hope there still remains, and I persevere on with my "practice", my atheism notwithstanding.

God bless you, Brian, for so beautifully recording your own journey in this blog. Footprints in the sand, and so forth. Others do draw both instruction and inspiration from you.

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