I've loved pondering the mystery of existence. Not individual stuff that exists within existence. Existence pure and simple. The fact that existence itself exists.
However, lately I've been wondering whether this whole existence pure and simple notion makes any sense. For a long time I've had this intuitive, emotional, awestruck feeling that somehow there is an existential underpinning to the cosmos that is, duh, existence.
Meaning, existence is akin or identical to "being." Which is a word that both philosophers and ordinary people use with ease. Yet usually without musing much about the concept.
It is. I am. We are.
Is, am, are.. these forms of "to be" sound so solid, so immutable, so unchanging. However, in reality everything does change. I am something for an instant. Then I'm something else.
Cells die and are born. Ideas come and go. Sensations flash into my psyche, then depart as quickly as they came. My internal organs are in constant motion. My body nearly so, in some fashion, for most of my waking moments.
Though godless and churchless now, I'm coming to realize that existence is a supposedly eternal omnipresent abstraction that, in some ways, took the place of a personal divinity for me.
God doesn't exist. But existence damn well does! Just look around, and believe!
It's been comforting to envision a transcendent Mystery of Existence that always has been, is now, and always will be. Hey, in a world of change, it's good to know that something in the cosmos will always remain the same.
Well, this presumes that "existence" refers to something real, not just a concept conjured up by neurons in the human brain. No one has ever seen, felt, touched, heard, or otherwise sensed existence pure and simple.
All we can experience is stuff that exists, not existence itself. In this regard, "existence" is like the idea of "self." We never catch ourselves as being a pure "self." Rather we experience happenings within and without ourselves.
Which can include the feeling that existence exists, or I am soul.
I'm coming to embrace a foundational view of the cosmos that is based on the deep philosophical premise of: Who the Fuck Knows?
Yeah, I know that certain things exist. But when it comes to Existence separate from any particular thing, I'm clueless. Maybe the cosmos just is what it is, as I am what I am: an ever-changing process, nothing eternal, including the laws of nature.
You see, my old notion of existence pure and simple lacks the ability to explain how all the stuff within existence came to be. So -- and this isn't an original idea -- existence must contain a creative principle in addition to a quality of just being. Otherwise existence would just sit there as a near-nothing.
Religious believers would jump at what I just said and scream, "That's God!"
To which I'd reply, "There's no proof of God, but plenty of proof that stuff exists. Why not just assume that the cosmos always has existed, and part of what exists is the ability to create more stuff that exists?"
Praise Something or Other! Glory be to Whatever the Hell Makes Things Be! This is enough for me.