"Living life to the fullest" is an adage that used to mean much more to me than it does now. In my true believing days I'd be anxious that I was missing out on the purpose of earthly existence.
Which I took to be: pursuing a spiritual path that would lead me out of the illusion of earthly existence.
So, in accord with the teachings of Radha Soami Satsang Beas (an Indian organization led by a guru), I diligently meditated for several hours a day and did my best to not get attached to worldly entanglements.
I failed, of course. Thankfully.
Because a religiosity which judgmentally divides life experiences -- worldly/spiritual, meaningless/meaningful, empty/full -- not surprisingly leads to a divisive and psychologically unhealthy outlook.
If someone is continually wondering, "Am I living my life to the fullest at this moment?" all that questioning is going to suck the joy out of the moments.
I'm still enjoying re-reading Alan Watts' "Become What You Are." Here's some passages from the Tomorrow Never Comes chapter.
When we say that all things in the universe are the creative activity of God, this is really like putting legs on a snake or painting the reflection in a mirror. It is not to be compared to seeing that activity as it is, although we say that it is God's activity to draw attention to it in a particular way.
But the trouble is, people spend so much energy looking for the God that they fail to see the activity, which is surely a sad state of affairs. What is this activity? The rivers flow; the flowers bloom; you walk down the street.
...The idea of God is a finger pointing the way to Reality, but when people try to join God and Reality, to identify the one with the other, to find the former in the latter, they are trying to join together two things that were never in need of being joined. This is like trying to make the eyes see themselves.
Yet how do we arrive at the state where to watch the snow falling is so much one with God that we need no more introduce God than put red paint on the roses?
Whence all this hurry to arrive at a state? Are you not already watching the snow? Are you not already face-to-face with the eternal mystery? Take it easy for a while; just watch the snow falling or the kettle boiling, and not so much hurry.
...But you are free to abandon yourself to actual life and to know that living in God is another name for this abandonment, for watching the snow and walking down the street.
...You say you do not feel this abandonment right now. What do you expect to feel? It is not a feeling; it is feeling. It is not a thought; it is thinking. If it were a particular thought or feeling there could be coming into it and going out of it; but God is One and all-inclusive, and here there can be neither coming nor going, inside or outside.
...As the verse says:
This you can not describe, nor paint,
Nor yet admire, nor feel.
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