On becoming the person you warned yourself about

Have you ever done something that you said you’d never do? I certainly have. I bet you have too. Such is a mark of flexibility, open-mindedness, and the ability to adapt to changing circumstances.

Only astoundingly rigid people continue to live their lives in the same fashion for many years or decades, doing the same old things, holding the same old beliefs, projecting the same old personalities.

Today I was reminded of a post that I wrote on my HinesSight weblog almost two years ago, “I’ve become the person that I warned myself about.” It’s one of my favorites. Still makes a lot of sense to me (so I must not have changed hugely since April 2004). I talk about how my approaches to the marital arts and to spiritual practice have both become a lot more eclectic.

Not so many years ago, eclecticism was something I didn’t believe in. Traditional Shotokan karate isn’t big on blending martial arts styles. The Shotokan way is pretty much considered to be the way. Similarly, the traditional Sant Mat philosophy isn’t big on blending practices from other spiritual traditions. You’re taught to meditate in a single fashion, regardless of whether it works for you.

I used to think that sticking with a single martial arts or meditation system through thick and thin was the best thing to do. I used to advise other people, and by implication, myself, not to try to cobble together an idiosyncratic blend of styles, techniques, and approaches.

Now I hold a different opinion. I consider that I’ve grown, not regressed. Read my post. Tell me if you agree. It’s fine if you don’t. That’s the beauty of eclecticism. Different strokes for different folks.

Comments

[ET]

I agree with you Brian, although until right this very instant I had never thought of myself as being eclectic. However, it is true for me too. For example, in my woodworking when I see a process or something that looks interesting I try it, if it works then I include it into my bag of tricks, otherwise I discard it. Likewise in my personal philosophy I simply pick up various ideas as I go along and if they work for me then I adopt them. (BTW my philosophical corner stone is; “I believer everything and nothing.”)

Furthermore, as I explained in an earlier post, my meditation process is not exactly the RS taught version. In the beginning my approach was to slowly move from what I had been doing to the pure RS version. I believe in slow wide turns. However, I found that the blend of my old process and the new RS process was working fairly well. So I have stuck with it because in talking to other RS initiates I have found that none of them had even been able to see any light let alone get out of their body or have any spiritual experiences. Thus in all of these years, I have never felt motivated to migrate completely to the pure RS version. I simply am not willing to let go of what works for me and try something that everybody I have talked to says does not work. I guess the RS version is a bit too advanced for me, or perhaps too foreign. My current approach is to listen to my inner voice and adopt and adjust my life, philosophy and meditation accordingly. Thus I too am becoming the person I warned myself about.

[Robert Howard]

Dear Brian,
Re. "...marital arts...": please don't smack your wife. RPH

[Brian]

Robert, rest assured that in our two human and one canine family, I occupy the bottom submissive position. When my wife isn't telling what to do, the dog is. I do get to hold the remote control, but that's only because my wife doesn't want to be bothered by it and our dog doesn't have an opposable thumb (otherwise, for sure we'd be watching the Cat Channel 24/7).

[Scott]

I've found that one sure way to "go Chaordic" is to move to the countryside. It's very calm and predictable and orderly. And then, it's not! Out that Chaord come milk, eggs, veggies, all organic and loved into existence by those you love. Hard to think of anything better.