Oh, man, I'm so bummed. Laurel picked up the newspaper yesterday and pointed out that PETA's Sexiest Vegetarian Next Door contest had a male Salem finalist.
And the guy wasn't me. The reason must have been that I didn't enter.
Oh, here's an idea: ageism.
I carefully inspected the photos of the male and female Sexiest Vegetarian Next Door 2008 contestants. Well, "carefully" actually only applies to one of the categories -- which featured this winner.
But I did zip through the bio's of the 16 male finalists and learned that the eldest was just 40. Forty! Are there no sexy vegetarians older than that?
Hopefully PETA will include a Senior category in its 2009 contest. I'm working on losing a few pounds and doing some extra weightlifting just in case. (Plus, figuring out how to use Photoshop, probably my best bet.)